Saturday, December 12, 2009

bombard these thoughts with bullets!

It's 5.36am already. My insomnia is worsening once again, I guess, and I don't think I'd fancy having short-term memory loss (or long-term after chronic usage) for taking alprazolam tablets T_T Guess I'll have to make it through without those drugs :(

My chronic post-traumatic stress disorder isn't helping either. It's not that funny or exciting anymore to get dreams about spinning almost every night, you see. It's not funny too to shiver or get anxious just at the sight of any hatchback that's similar to the one that used to belong to me... even thinking of it alone becomes stressing! Perhaps cognitive and behavioral therapies aren't that bad after all (not as bad as it sounded a few months ago)?

So, here I am, boredom is numbing my mind and I'm left with ridiculous thoughts again :P Now, there are a few ideas floating in my mind currently -
1. I'm thinking of having my eyebrows done - like the one I drew (sorry for the badly drawn picture, I was lazy to run Photoshop) below

For some reasons, I find it extremely cool. ROFL. Have a look at Shota Matsuda's in Love Shuffle, yang samurai-ish look haha!

2. Since I'm about to receive my scholarship, I'm thinking of spending a quarter to half of the total amount to buy an electrical guitar. For some unknown reasons, Ayah didn't mind splurging a lot for a classical guitar (without jack, totally non-electronic), but as long as a jack exists on a particular guitar, it's a straight NO-NO.

3. Once again, I'm thinking of piercing my lower lip like I used to, but I'm very positive the doc will chase me out of the clinic if I'm seen wearing it... or even putting a transparent stick into the hole. An obvious NO-NO too.

4. I know the condition of my laptop is so bad physically and yes, I've heard enough of, "Tukarlah laptop, Z", already, but I'm seriously thinking of upgrading its RAM to 4gB.

5. I want to install Mortal Kombat, King of Fighters, and Street Fighter games... again :D Let's add Battle Realm to the list.

6. It's weird to have this one wish located at the bottom of my hopeful list - to complete studying central nervous system and reproductive chapters. See, my MDD peaked during both chapters.

I know, I know, I'd probably get more people getting all judgemental having to read some of the things above, but they're just thoughts. As Russell Peters said it, "Even if I were, they're my fucking thoughts. If would've wanted them to be true, I would've set them", sorry for the vulgarities, am just writing down what he said, hoho :P Nevertheless, The dialogue above only applies to thoughts no. 1 and 3.


Anonymous said...

tukar lah laptop~jejeje

FurBall said...

lupa lak dah pat guna account aku^_^v